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It's Been A Rough One

Make room for the sad. It's going to be okay. Give it space. You are valid.

The past two days have been a rough one for me. I've been in such a good flow for the past four weeks that having this overwhelming day was heart wrenching. It creeped up slowly. I knew something was off, but I thought getting out in the sun and stuffing my face with mac and cheese would calm it down. The next day I had two doctors appointments (one for me and one for my dog) and both charged me a price I wasn't expecting. I got in the car and started driving home and all the overwhelming feelings that were creeping up the three days prior came all at once. I pulled over and had a huge panic attack. Crying, hyperventilating, intrusive thoughts. I got myself to cry it out, calm down, and then headed to my best friends house. An evening of venting, chilling on her couch watching housewives, and being fed pizza and pb ice cream. I'm thankful for my close circle.

If you have been dealing with overwhelming feelings; I hear you, I love you, you are valid. I send you a bigggggg Puerto Rican hug. I spent the first day of my overwhelming feelings letting it be. Allowing myself to eat the cookies, sit in comfy clothes, not doing as much work, stretching, and getting sun. Yesterday was letting it all out. Today I let myself sleep, not shower until I felt up to it, slowly get back to my normal.

I write this because I want you to know that even I still go through big feelings. Even this far into my healing journey there are days where it's hard to remember your tool box. But you are safe here and if you ever need anything I am here.

Te Quiero, Amarilys

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